The Lord of the Rings: Parts 1, 2 & 3

So the bottom line is this...a man-child (Frodo) is given a ring (the one to rule them all), by his Uncle Bilbo (who apparently is older than dirt's grandfather), and he must go to the depths of Mordor (eek! scary!) to destroy it. It's 1,068 pages of just that...a perilous journey for the 9 of Middle Earth.


J.R.R. Tolkien, however, turns it into a rollercoaster for the imagination. There are elves and dwarves, uruk-hai and orcs, men and hobbits! It takes place in the Shire, Gondor, Rivendell, Lothlorien, Fangorn Forest, Isengard, Mordor, the Mines of Moria! They use swords, arrows, axes and staffs to conquer their foes! How on Earth, or Middle Earth for that matter, could someone not fall in absolute love with these books?! It was a tedious journey for all those traveling from The Shire to Mordor AND for those reading of this expedition.


I'll be really honest here...I'm having a serious case of writers block! The two previous paragraphs were written about a week ago and have been part of a saved draft since then! Lol! Part of the problem is that I'd already read these books once before AND seen all three movies several times. Instead of being able to sit here and write about how great and detailed the books are all I can do is think of how much I would like to be Viggo Mortensen's wife! Don't judge! Ugh!!!!!! I won't leave this blog without having written a little bit though...

The Fellowship of the Ring was by far my favorite of the three parts! It has everything a story needs...a party, a coming together of uncommon people for a greater task, action and heartache. When Frodo, Sam, Merry and Pippin start out it's actually quite bo-ring! But, after meeting up with crazy Tom Bombadil things start to pipe up. The Prancing Pony is where they meet Strider (otherwise known as my future ex-husband Viggo Mortensen) and discover how perilous this journey really is. The five of them then set out for Rivendell where eventually the Fellowship is created. Joining them is Gandalf the Grey (a wizard, who has probably smoked more pot than any person EVER has...EVER), Gimli, a dwarf (who clearly has issues with his size), Legolas, an elf (who must see something we don't in a far off place) and Boromir from Gondor (my first ex-husband). As they travel they encounter orcs in the Mines of Moria (where Gimli's people are from) and then lose Gandalf to a balrog (a big, nasty, creature that would literally cause me to make a mess of myself)! They meet Galadriel in Lothlorien and she gives them some really cool stuff...most of which will come in handy later, especially those boats! HA! Anyway, after Boromir succombs to the power of the Ring, the group meets some really awesome (oh yes, I said awesome) uruk-hai and some more orcs. He ends up getting shot to death by a bunch of arrows and the Fellowship is pretty upset about it. Frodo and ... now this just sounds like a flippin' book report. FML!

This is just silly. I can't think straight...not...enough...coffee.

Okay, I think I'm done with this. Seriously.

Ooh, but I totally have a crush on Karl Urban who plays Eomer!!!!!!!!!!!

Oh yeah, the other two parts are called The Two Towers and The Return of the King. ;)

LOTR update

I read the first part of LOTR (The Fellowship of the Ring) in six days, the second (The Two Towers) in eight days. But it has taken me two days to read one chapter in the third (Return of the King) part! I don't know what it is but this third book is really freaking tough to get into! All I can picture is cutie-patootie Sean Bean (Boromir) getting killed with a bunch of arrows, the blond God Orlando Bloom (Legolas) staring off into space with those gorgeous eyes of his, and ruggedly handsome Viggo Mortensen (Aragorn) slaying everything on his path to my heart! How will I ever make it through part three?!

In betweener

In the last nine days I've finished LotR: Fellowship of the Ring and started The Two Towers. I know that these books are one and of themselves but I'm only going to do one post about all three combined! And I promise you, it will be a loooooong post...so be afraid, be very afraid!!!! Eek!